On the rare occasions that you see a stay at home mom in movies, they're usually comedies. The wife is often standing in the middle of a room with a number of kids running around her, all of them acting like brats. The mom usually has something stuck in her hair, a baby in her arms screaming at the top of its lungs, while she just stands, defeated, questioning her life choices. And when the husband invariably comes home, she just glares at him. Where you don't see stay at home moms very often are in romance dramas. I guess that's not what people want to see in those kind of movies.
However, as someone married to one of these amazing women, I'll let you in on a little secret. Being a stay at home mom is sexy.
Sure, there are some days that she can barely find a break in the day to pee, much less take a shower. But even on those hectic days, when I walk in the door she's not angry at me for burdening her with all of these children. She comes up to me, and every day she wraps her arms around me and kisses me. Every day as soon as I come home. She smiles. She's excited. And during the day, she begs me to come home, but not so I can take over so she can go out and take a break. Could she use a break? Sure. But that's not what she's wanting. She misses me, and wants to see me.
The thing is, Wendy tells me all the time that she wants the relationship between us to come before the kids. She loves me more than the kids. And that's really saying something, because she adores those kids. She wants us to be solid first, because if that doesn't happen, we'll never be who we should be for our kids. Wendy loves me. She invests in me. She's passionate about me.
You see? Being a stay at home mom is sexy.
The great thing about having a woman like Wendy at home during the day, especially for someone as absentminded as I am, is that she can keep my head on straight. I don't know how many times I've forgotten to do something at work, only to have Wendy remind me. How does she know to do this? Well, after the hug and kiss when I get home, she always asks me what happened at work. This isn't an idle question. She really wants to know. She actually listens as I rattle on about whatever is going on at AMX, and she gives her thoughts and advice. She's my secretary, my advisor, and my confidant.
The thing about Wendy is that she is a biblical example of a serving wife. In these modern times, people have a different idea of what womanhood means, and not all of it is bad. Society is remembering again that women are strong and capable. That's biblical. Look at Proverbs 31. That talks about a wife buying fields and making good decisions for her family. That's not some wallflower. And that's Wendy. But she also puts me first, and submits to my leadership. And that all comes from her. It's nothing I laid down. It's something important to her. She consistently puts my desires, my wants, and my needs before her own. Let me tell you. That kind of attitude is really attractive.
Like I said. Being a stay at home mom is sexy.
Now, it's not just her attitude towards me. Do our kids act up and try to test their boundaries? Sure. They're four, two, and 10 months. Pushing past boundaries is what kids do, especially at those ages. But when our kids to act up, Wendy takes them into their room, punishes them, and then talks to them about their actions. She tells them that not only is acting like that disobedient to Mommy and Daddy (which makes us sad), it also is a sin before God. She tells the girls about sin, and models Christ's forgiveness by hugging and kissing them and reminding them that she'll always love them, no matter what they do.
I never worry about my kids growing up to be menaces to society. It's hard being away from them during the day, to have so little time with them during the week. However, I don't have to worry about what's being poured into them while I'm not there. I know Wendy's there, praying with them, playing with them, and investing in them just like she does with me. This lets me focus on work, and I can trust that Wendy is teaching them about the important things: beauty, goodness, and truth. Feeling secure on the home front is immeasurably important to success at work and at life.
It's also very sexy.
Of course, it's not all punishment at our house. In fact, Wendy makes life at our house a lot of fun. I could start listing examples, but really, just go back and look at the other posts on this blog. Can you imagine what life is like at this house? Our kids have it good! If we had absolutely nothing, our kids would still have a great childhood. Wendy would find a way. She's fun, crazy, goofy, imaginative, and full of laughter. No matter how tired she is, she always has a smile for our kids. When our kids are older, they won't remember a mom that was always tired or busy. They'll remember a mom who smiled when they walked into a room. They'll remember how much she loved them.
That's what it really all comes down to. Wendy is so full of love for our family. It comes through in every single second of her day. It drives all the little things and the big things that she does for our household. Without her, everything would break down.
Just see how things go for me and the kids when she leaves for a couple hours. On too rare occasions, Wendy gets to hang with a friend without kids in tow. I'll stay at home with the kids, and while I do try to keep things running and "do things," a lot of the time it's survival mode. I just try to make sure the kids are still alive and the house is still intact when she gets home. It takes every ounce of my effort to accomplish even this. Without Wendy, things don't last around here very long. And all of the work she does (and she works HARD) is because she loves us all so deeply.
And you know what? Love is sexy.